This Kiss
by kittylovesanime
Summary: Jane is going behind Roxy's and Jake's backs with Dirk, but she just can't resist.


"Where ya goin Janey…?" Roxy asks from her place on the living room couch. Her eyes are glazed over; she's already drunk.

"Out," I answer happily, shrugging my white coat on.

"To the club again…? Damn Janey…you sure love that place." The blonde drunk snickers.

_You don't even know the half of it._

The bodyguard sees me and unchains the rope to let me pass. "Welcome back," he greets, smiling.

"Glad to be back, Equius." I step inside and already the music is pulsing through me. I take off my coat and hand it to Kanaya at the drop-off desk.

"Hello Again Miss Jane," she says, smiling serenely. "Another Night?"

I laugh. "Yeah. Is he here yet?"

"Why don't you turn around?" Hot breath caresses my cheek, sending shivers down my spine. I turn to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I smile stupidly at him, my cheeks flushing.

"Well well well, if it isn't Mr. Strider," I say.

"Glad you're back," Dirk says, smirking. He puts an arm around my waist and leads me away to the dance floor, saying over his shoulder, "thanks for keeping her company, Kanaya."

"Of Course."

I giggle. "How'd you know where to find me? I just got here."

"I just always know where you are. It's like I have a radar for you."

"Aww, how cute," I tease. He blushes slightly.

"Shut up and let's dance."

"No, wait!" I twirl a little, showing off my light blue summer dress with an orange sash. "You like?"

The blonde chuckles. "A dress in winter? You crazy girl. But yes, I like."

I laugh. "I'm glad!" I spin away from him, much to his shock.

"Janey, wait…!" he calls out. He reaches out to me, but I evade him, loving the chase. I bump into Terezi.

"OH…! W3LL LOOK WHO'S B4CK. H3Y GUYS, 1T'S J4N3!" she announces, getting the attention of the people around us. They all grin at me and raise their drinks. I hug the blind troll. "WH3R3'S YOUR STR1D3R?" she asks.

"Looking for me. Ah, there he is! Gotta go, Terezi!" I prance away just as Dirk gets here.

"Jane!" he calls again, but I hear the smile in his voice; he's loving the chase too. I get to the middle of the dance floor when I let him catch me. He pulls me from behind and I feel his muscular chest pressing against my back. "Gotcha," he whispers in my ear. I look up at him and start giggling. "What is it?"

"Take your shades off, silly." I reach for his face. Dirk laughs and lets me take them off, as always. They reveal his bright orange eyes. "That's better."

"Oh, Jane." He rocks us slowly, rubbing his hands down my sides, going for my hands. I thread our fingers together as I push myself off of him. One look at his eyes, and we both already know what to do. Dirk spins me around him, and we do a bit of salsa dancing, even though the music is currently techno. I hear whistles in the crowd. _We always give them a show, now don't we?_

Suddenly, I let go of Dirk's hand and do a little flamenco dance, moving my hips and shoulders. From afar, I admire Dirk's light blue T-shirt with a pair of black jeans. _How cute, he's wearing my color._ I get jiggy with it by myself, knowing that his eyes are all over me. I turn to face him, beckoning him with a manicured finger. He smiles and dances towards me. We reach out for each other, but a bunch of our club friends interrupt us; Terezi and Latula appear and hold us back from each other. _Oh, so close!_

"H4H4, D4NC3 W1TH US FOR 4 WH1L3," Terezi says, pulling me away. Latula does the same with Dirk.

"But…" I half-protest, meeting eyes with Dirk. His orange eyes tell me to dance with them; he'll be back with me. _Well, alright…_ Terezi brings me to some of the other trolls, like Gamzee, Sollux, Vriska, Tavros, and Damara.

"Come oooooooon Jane!" Vriska calls. They envelope me in their group, motioning for me to dance. _Guess I have to do what they want. _

I let myself go and enjoy myself with my new friends, knowing I'll be back in Dirk's arms soon enough.

"Soooooooo Jane, where's your guy?" Vriska questions, sipping a martini. We're sitting with Terezi and Dave at a corner table, taking a breather.

"At the bar," I reply without thinking. The cerulean blood raises her eyebrow and turns to look for him; miraculously, he's at the bar, leaning on it and talking to Kurloz, the bartender.

"Damn girl, how'd you know? This place is crowded as hell!"

I blush. "I just knew, I guess."

"Ahhh, he's on her radar!" Dave yells, laughing. I blush harder and don't comment. I sip my glass of Pepsi

"COM3 ON D4V3, L3T H3R B3. BUT YOU SOO H4V3 TH3 HOTS FOR H1M," Terezi says, winking at me, even though she's blind. I smile and my eyes wander over to Dirk and Kurloz. The blonde seems to be enjoying himself, even though Kurloz can't speak. Somehow, Dirk catches my eye, and it's like everything falls away and it's only the two of us. I can't help but swoon at the way he looks at me. _I want to dance with him._

"Jane?" Vriska snaps her fingers in my face, startling me. I jump out of my seat and almost spill my drink.

"V-Vriska! You scared me!" I scold.

"You were out of it!" she retorts.

"1 KNOW WH4T SH3 W4S TH1NK1NG 4BOUT," Terezi sing-songs. Dave starts laughing knowingly.

"Sh-shut up…!" I mutter, my face heating up.

"Ahaaaaaaaa! You want the D!" Vriska announces.

"Wh-what? N-no, Vriska, that's-"

"Don't lie Jane! Just go, he's coming."

"That's not true," I say.

"Look for yourself," Dave chimes. Slowly, I look to the bar again, and there's Dirk, dancing his way towards me. I just know that my face is lighting up. I get up and begin a slow dance to him across the dance floor.

"G3T OUT TH3R3 YOU T1G3R," Terezi calls after me, accompanied by cheers. I stopped paying attention-all I care about is Dirk and how I'm almost there.

In a heartbeat, our hands meet and we dance wildly, like we're in a bubble. Dirk runs a hand through my short black hair and I place my hands on his chest. I push him a little, just to tease him, then I shimmy my shoulders at him. He smirks and follows suit. I stare into his intense orange eyes, and it's as if he's staring at my heart. _I'd give it to him too, if it was possible…_

Dirk pulls me by my waist and kisses my cheek. I know that half the club is staring at us, hearing the hoots and hollers. "Oh, Dirk," I tease, "you missed the target by a few inches."

"Oh, Jane, so impatient." But he gives me what we've been wanting this whole time; a kiss on my lips. I relish in his pumpkin pie taste. I honestly can't get enough of it. It feels like eternity when our lips part. I look at his eyes, and I can clearly see the love he has for me. _I don't want this to end…_

"We're here," Dirk says, stopping his sleek black car a few houses away from my home. I would have him park right in front, but it's safer this way; Roxy won't know a thing. He looks at me and puts an arm around my shoulders, bringing me to him. At this proximity, I smell his mango scent that I didn't smell at the club. I rest my head on his shoulder, loving his warmth.

"I don't want to go," I whine, mindlessly tracing lines on his chest.

"Then don't. The night is still young."

I snort. "It's 1 a.m. I have to go home."

"But baby, it's cold outside."

I pull away from him, a knowing look in my eyes. "You quoted that from a song, didn't you?"

"And what if I did?"

"You, Dirk Strider, you're a piece of work."

"Why thank you." He tips an imaginary hat at me. "But honestly, stay. Please?"

I shake my head at him. "I really must go."

"Then how about this as a parting gift?" He leans over and kisses me softly, making me want more, so much more. I melt into him, tangling my fingers in his short blonde hair. Soon enough, I can't seem to breathe anymore. We pull away to catch our breaths. I know that my heart's beating as fast as a hummingbird's wings. We glance at each other. Dirk's cheeks are as red as cherries. "More?" he asks as soon as he gains normal breathing.

I laugh under my breath. "You tempt me so, Strider…"

"Soo," he leans close to me, hesitating on my lips, "is that a yes?"

"Why don't we find out?" I close the millimeter gap between us and kiss him hard. _I honestly can't resist._

He moans softly and tries to pull me closer. I have no idea how, but I end up in the driver's seat with him, on his lap. I feel us falling back, making me yelp. "Don't worry," he whispers, "I just put the seat back. Make ourselves more comfortable."

That snaps me out of it. "No, Dirk, I can't stay." I pull away, but it feels like I'm doing it against my will.

"But baby, it's cold outside," he tries again. I laugh.

"Seriously, though, I must get back. Roxy's waiting."

He hugs me. "She could be knocked out on the couch, though…"

"True, but I must go back either way." He peppers me with kisses all over my face, trying to make me stay. "Oh, Dirk…"

"Janey…" I rest my head on his chest, and we don't speak for a while.

"We're quite fucked up, to be doing this behind their backs," I comment quietly. We both know this is bound to come up.

"I know," he says.

"I mean, Roxy is a real sweet girl."

"And Jake is a nice guy."

"Details we forgot to mention when we first met, huh?" We laugh a little, but we quiet down again.

"…But I love you," Dirk blurts out of nowhere. I look up to see his orange eyes look so hopeful. I bite my lip, desperately wanting to admit the same thing, but I don't want to betray Roxy and Jake any more. "Janey?"

"U-um…I-I have to go," I stutter. I open the car door and stumble out awkwardly. I make my way towards my house, my heels clacking on the sidewalk.

"Jane!" Dirk calls out. I hear him getting out of the car and following me. He reaches me quickly, grabbing my elbow.

"Dirk, get back in the car!" I hiss, trying to pull away.

"But…your purse." He holds out my small, light blue clutch at me.

"O-oh…thank you." I grab my clutch and he lets go of me, but then he leans in for a quick, sweet kiss.

"You're welcome." The blonde smirks at me and goes back to his car. In a flash, he turns on the engine and drives away, his car making almost no noise. I'm left watching him disappear into the night, a hand over my heart.

_You do tempt me so…_

"Jane?"

"Yes, Jake?" I look up at him. My head's resting on his shoulder, and he's playing with my hair as we watch T.V in his darkened living room. Doctor Who's currently on. It confuses me so, but Jake adores it.

His green eyes meet with my blue ones. "How are you?" He smiles a little.

_What kind of question is that?_ "I'm fine, Jake, as always. Why do you ask?"

He ponders for a moment. I watch as his bangs fall into his eyes. "I don't know. You seem…different today."

I freeze. _What does that mean?_ "Is that a bad thing?"

"No, not at all! You're more affectionate lately, and I do love affection, especially from you. It just makes me wonder what happened to change your behavior."

My eyes look around the room frantically, then they search Jake's eyes for any suspicious thoughts. _Does he know?_ But nothing. They're as bright and naïve as always. For a moment, I almost blurt that I've been going behind his back with someone else-his best friend. _Am I going too far?_ But then I push the thought out of my head-I rather not think about it for a while, at least not with Jake right here, loving me.

We turn our attention back to the T.V, Jake's hand petting me softly. _He really is a sweet guy…_ I snuggle to his side, wanting to make it up to him, even though he has no idea. Jake looks back down at me. "My my Jane! You sure do like cuddling."

"Of course," I say, kissing his cheek. He blushes and kisses my forehead. I blush as well and we sit there, smiling at each other. Sometimes it feels like how we were when we first started out: shy and holding back, but happy with each other all the same. I go for his neck, nibbling on the skin a bit. I hear him yelp, but he pulls me close, rubbing my back. I stop and look into his eyes again. He smiles at me, then kisses me so sweetly. It's as if it's our first kiss again, exploring each other's mouths tentatively. He tastes like kiwi, as always.

It slowly leads up to a more intense kiss. I feel a heat going through my entire body, and I just need to let it out. I pull away and attempt to take off my shirt, but Jake stops me. "Not tonight," he says. I can tell he wants more though; his eyes have turned a darker green with lust. His cheeks are flushed, and I know he can see the same with me.

"But…" I start to protest.

"Shh, it's okay. I can hold it back." He kisses me softly again, gently caressing my cheek. I lose myself in him, thinking, _I can't resist him either…_

I'm staring at the door, itching to just leave and go back to the club. I'm in the mood of losing myself in the music and the people…especially Dirk. But I'm at his house, so that really makes no sense. Roxy insisted we all have dinner together, so Dirk and I can "get to know each other." _As if we don't know each other well enough._

Dirk takes hold of me from behind, kissing my neck. I almost melt against him, but I have to stay strong-oh, who am I kidding? This is all I've been craving for. "Relax," he whispers in my ear.

"I can't. They're coming and they expect us to be like strangers, when we're so much more!"

"Shh, don't worry."

I turn to face him. His eyes are hidden by his anime shades. "How can I _not_ worry?!"

"Janey. Just act like you know nothing about me other than that I'm a mechanical genius and I love the color orange."

"But I know other things!"

"You better keep quiet about them, or I might have to shut you up." His voice drops low.

"And how are-?" Dirk shuts me up with a deep kiss, making me feel dizzy. _Whoa._ I feel my body heating up. He smirks at me. "Y-you better not do that while Roxy and Jake are here."

"How can I, if I barely know you?" he asks as he walks away from me, going towards the dining room. I follow him, wanting to say something witty, but coming up with nothing. I mentally curse myself. I watch him fix the table, even though it's been set perfectly. "But," he continues, "I know you very well right now."

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "Yeah…"

He strides to my side, holding my hand gently. "I know how you like to be teased." He raises my hand to his lips and he kisses it. My breath catches in my throat. "And I know how old-fashioned you are." He trails up my arm with little kisses. I stand there, unable to react. When he reaches my neck, he says, "I know where you like to be kissed," and kisses my neck again. Then slowly, oh so slowly, he goes up to my lips, whispering, "And I know just how much you want me to kiss you right now."

"Th-that's not true," I manage to stutter.

"Hm. We'll see about that, now won't we?" He gives me another deep kiss, intensifying it. Craving for this kiss, I pull him close to me, wrapping my legs around his waist. We end up against the wall, both of us moaning; it's clear we want so much more.

I'm this close to suggest taking this somewhere more comfortable, when the doorbell rings. _Fuck!_

Dirk pulls away a little. "Well, they're early."

"Way too early," I murmur.

"Diiiirk?" Roxy calls through the door. "Open up babe!"

"Just a minute!" Dirk answers, completely masking his gasps of breath. I stare at him in wonder. _How does he do it?_ "Okay, Janey," he says quietly, "it's go time."

"But I don't want to," I half-whine. "I want more of this."

"It's alright. Just follow my lead tonight, okay?"

I nod and unwrap my legs slowly. Meanwhile, the doorbell keeps ringing.

"Dirk? Yo it's cold as shit up in here open up!"

"Yeah mate!" Jake chirps. "Please open the door!"

"Coming!" the blonde answers, releasing his hold on me, going to the door. He opens it and there they are, my boyfriend and my best friend. They're shivering in their coats, Roxy holding a flask.

"Damn I was about to drink up to keep myself warm," she says, pushing her way in, shrugging off her coat, revealing her strapless lavender dress. Jake steps in shyly, even though he's been to Dirk's house countless times.

"Jake, don't be so tense," Dirk says, chuckling. Jake takes off his jacket and hands it to Dirk. The blonde goes upstairs to put it away, along with Roxy's coat. Both Jake and Roxy stand in the living room, looking around. I take notice of Jake's green button down shirt and black jeans, his signature look. I love it either way.

Finally, Jake notices me at the dining room and exclaims, "Jane! You're here?" I've forgotten that I came here early without telling them, wanting to spend some alone time with Dirk. Then I remember I'm frozen against the wall.

I make myself calm my nerves and approach them, saying weakly, "Surprise!"

Roxy jumps on me. "Janeyyy! When did you come here?"

"A while ago."

"Why?" I freeze again. _What should I say?_

"She wanted to come a little early and help me set up. It was a great opportunity to get to know her a little, wasn't it, Jane?" Dirk cuts in, appearing again.

"Yeah!" I say, sounding a little too eager. Thankfully, Roxy and Jake buy it.

"That's great!" Roxy says, smiling widely. "Now, let's eat!"

I'm pushing my food around the plate; I lost my appetite after eating the mashed potatoes. Don't get me wrong, everything is delicious, but my nerves are getting in the way of me fully enjoying the food. I glance at Dirk, sitting across from me. Jake's at my right, really digging into his steak. Roxy, at Dirk's left, is mostly drinking champagne, her plate clean. Dirk meets my eyes and subtly motions for me to keep eating, as if nothing's wrong. _But something is._

"So Diiiirk," Roxy drunkenly says, "did you know…that Janeyy bakes?"

Dirk raises his eyebrows in mock surprise. "Is that so?"

"Yeah!" Jake says. "She has her own bakery downtown!" _As if Dirk doesn't already know._ "She makes the BEST pastries ever. You should come by one day," Jake continues.

Dirk smirks. "Maybe I will." I can't help but snort a little, thinking about the countless times he's come by just when I'm about to close up, trying out my random creations of tres leches, cotton candy cake, and flan. We'd chat and Dirk would compliment me profusely about my baking, all innocent. Somehow, though, we always ended up making out. We'd tease each other as well.

"_I shouldn't!" _I'd say.

"_You should." _He would wink.

"_I couldn't, now could I?"_

"_Just kiss me, Jane."_

"Jane?" I snap out of it.

"Huh?"

Roxy and Jake are looking at me with a little concern. "You alll riiight Jane?" Roxy questions.

"Yes, of course."

"You haven't really eaten…" Jake muses, looking at my plate. I cut up the steak into little pieces, but I haven't taken a bite at all. The shrimp are left untouched.

"I, um, I'm not all that hungry, honestly," I answer after a moment of silence.

"Come on, Jane, my cooking can't be that bad," Dirk jokes.

"I-it's not!" I insist. To assure everyone that I'm okay, I stuff shrimp into my mouth, not really noticing its taste. They let it go. Jake takes hold of my hand under the table, a warm gesture letting me know that he's on my side…whatever it is.

After ten minutes of eating and small talk, Roxy whines, "Diiiirk baaaabe! Why are your shades on?"

"I always have them on, Roxy."

"Exactly…!" She turns to face Jake and me. "Y'all knoww how HARD it is…to get this guy to take his shades off…?" She hiccups a little.

"Yeah," Jake comments, "Mr. Strider doesn't like to show his eyes." But I already know that; yet Dirk trusts me enough to let me see them on a regular basis.

"Oh, really?" I say, faking confusion.

Roxy nods vigorously. She then puts her hands on Dirk's cheeks and squeezes them. "You're so cute Dirk! Now…take off your shades! Let Janey…see your eyes!"

"Yeah old chap!" Jake chimes. "Take them off!"

Slowly, Dirk lowers his shades, but doesn't take them off completely. I can barely see his orange eyes, but I know that they're flecked with laughter.

"That doesn't count Dirk…!" Roxy scolds. She starts giggling for no reason. _It's the champagne…_

Dirk relents and takes them off fully and looks right at me. Once again, my breath is taken away by his eyes. _It's like they're the lock and key to my heart._ _I'll gladly give it to him, too…_

"Jane?" Dirk asks. I realize that I haven't said anything.

"E-er, they're really bright!" I finally say, mentally slapping myself. _What does that even mean?_

"Riiight?!" Roxy says. She leans over and kisses him on the mouth. He immediately pulls her in, giving it all he's got. He holds her gently yet firmly. I feel Jake's hand gripping mine a little tighter-I've forgotten he's still holding it. I have the irrational urge to break the couple apart. _He's mine!_ I want to say, but I know he belongs with Roxy. I have my own lover: Jake. _God, what's wrong with me?_

When they finally pull away, I see the look in Dirk's eyes. That loving look. The look that means he's completely and utterly in love with her, and will do anything for her. My heart shatters at that moment. I've known it all along; he's with her and always will be. He might look at me with love, but I'm nothing compared to Roxy. And I might crave him in ways I can't explain, but the bond I have with Jake is enough for me.

_But it hurts to know…_

I stand up suddenly from the table, almost knocking over my chair. Jake's hand slips away from mine. All eyes are on me: Roxy's pink ones, Jake's green ones, and Dirk's orange ones. Two pairs of eyes are bewildered and other pair understands my reaction.

"I-I'm just…gonna…" I feel the tears welling up and I run from the table and up the stairs, ignoring Roxy's and Jake's cries.

I make it to the second floor and run into any random room, blindly rushing in and locking the door behind me. I slide to the floor, the tears blurring everything. I sob loudly, hating myself for it. _I took it way too far. But I can't deny my feelings…_

I hear a light knock on the door. "Go away," I blubber, crying harder.

"Janey, it's me." Dirk. I want to run to his arms and cry my heart out, but I also don't want him to see me like this. "What is it, Janey?"

"You already know!" I yell through my tears.

He sighs. "I know. But tell me anyways."

"It hurts, okay?! It hurts knowing that we won't really be together, because we're where we belong." I keep on crying.

There's silence on Dirk's side, then he says, "Let me in." For a split second, I don't know if he means my heart, or the door. I get up, wobbling on my feet, and unlock the door. He pushes it open. I stare at the floor, not wanting him to see my tears. "Look at me, Jane."

I shake my head violently. He sighs again and pulls me into his arms, and I can't help but cry my heart out on his chest, muttering incoherent words. Dirk takes it all in, standing there, running his fingers through my hair, without saying a word. In the middle of my crying, I hear it. Dirk's heartbeat. It's a little faster than normal, but steady enough. _It's so unreliable. It's beating for her, Roxy. Dammit, why can't I stop…?!_

"Dirk." I sniffle.

"Yes?"

"I don't know what to do. Are we going too far?"

"Maybe, maybe not."

"It was supposed to be all innocent; no one was supposed to get hurt."

"But you got hurt, didn't you, Jane?"

"Yes…! And it hurts so bad…!" I look up at him, the tears still falling. Dirk kisses them away, but that only makes me cry more. He doesn't stop trying, though.

"Jane. It's up to you how far you want to go. I'll keep going, as long as you still feel for me like I do." _But that's the thing; you don't feel for me the same. I guess I don't either…_ "Do you want to keep trying, Janey?" His orange eyes bore into my blue ones so intensely. I nod silently, knowing that this is wrong, that maybe we are going too far, but I can't stop.

He kisses me softly, as always. Of course, I reciprocate; I kiss him back just as softly. We pull away, and give each other small smiles. He holds out a hand. "You ready to come back?" he asks.

"Yeah, as long as I have you by my side, I'll be okay." _For a while longer._ I join my hand with his. We go towards the stairs, back to where my best friend and boyfriend are. It feels like we're jumping back into the unknown, but I know that Dirk won't let go.

As we descend the stairs, I think, _I do love him; I really just can't resist._


End file.
